Walk Of Shame

Posted: 11/02/2011 in Random
Tags: , , , , ,

When I was young and foolish!

True Story!

On a Wednesday night there was only one place to go, a place of hardcore music, weird people and really cheap drinks. The drinks were so cheap both in price and in quality that you knew there was gonna be problems the next day i.e.  fever, diarrhoea and memory loss. Burn was a great night club, people dressed down to go there and just didn’t give a shit about anything, dark and gloomy with two different themed dance floors, rap and alterative metal/rock. The bar counters were always sticky with spilled drinks hhmm my kind of place.

The drinks special on Wednesday Night were any shot R1,50 so of course most of us drank whiskey and water with the occasional black label beer. AAhhh, this is where my story starts….

Something like this was common

After consuming a large amount of whiskey and beer I was staggering around trying to bob and weave in a series of hardcore complex dance routines thereby showing my dominance on the dance floor. I was getting tired, the people on the dance floor knew I was that good and my drinks were one sip to being finished, which is the signal to get MORE.

On the way to the bar a great idea was formed in my brain. Actually it was a terrible idea but I’m sure someone had implanted it earlier, something like inception. My idea was to walk home, which by the way was at least 20 kilometers away.

Without so much of a farewell to my friend, I started the long trek home. I was feeling good, in a jovial manner I was crab-walking along the street. After some time I found myself in some bushes, I didn’t remember going into a forest. In the distance I heard,

“Get out of my garden, I’m going to call the police.”

What I proberly looked like

At that point I realized that I was more lost than I thought. And what a mean old lady, here I am lost and confused. Ok, so I was properly on my hands and knees crawling around but she should have helped out or at least give me a shirt or something. Anyway I didn’t feel like spending the night in jail so I decided to get the hell out there as fast as possible.

After some more crab-walking I found myself in a strange white building. It was dark and strangely eerie. I was scared! Some of booze effects was wearing off but this means instead of seeing 4  I was only seeing double. Out of nowhere a man approached and said,

“What are you doing here? Visiting hours are between 11 and 4.”

“WTF, whers immm ?” ,was my reply

“You’re in the hospital”

I explained to the security guard that I was lost and so on. I don’t think he understood much of what I was said however at that stage a stoke of luck happened. One of my friends found me. After many explanations from my friend and dirty looks from me we left. I was still in the walking mood and kindly informed my friends at that stage I was going to continue my walk home. Then I overheard some thing that sobered me up. Thank god they didn’t resort to this, instead I meekly got in the car and was escorted home. What I overheard was,

“Hey Ross, I think we have a brick and baseball bat in the boot, I think we should use it to calm him down”

  1. Anonymous says:

    hahaha i think i remember this. hey old friend what is this site?

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