Posts Tagged ‘stupid’

The Snake!

Posted: 15/11/2010 in Random
Tags: , , , , , ,

While at work the other day I had a fairly strange and embarrassing moment, this is how it went…

I was sitting enjoying one of the rare moments of “quiet time”, when I received a call.

“Hello, Adam speaking”, I answered in my firm, business manner.

“Hello Adam! There’s .. there’s… there’s… there’s a snake right next to me. What should I do?”, a female colleague shouted.

I processed to tell her in a mild, bored tone to remain calm as chances are she was just over reacting. Come on, I’ve heard of no snakes in Dubai besides the occasional sea snake. I found out where she was and strolled at a leisurely pace to her location, muttering under my breath, ” Stupid girls always over reacting, damn it, damn it.”

Finally I got to her a little breathless because I had muttered so much.  I asked where it was and there it was as real as can be. I’m no snake charmer but it made sense to me that if we leave it alone it would do like wise, however I work in a hotel resort and the last thing I need is a guest getting bitten by a snake. 

Gingerly I closed the distance between the myself and the snake trying to make no sudden movements, a quick darting object moved around my side vision. My colleague was bolting full tilt away from the scene, hands in the air screaming in afrikaans, ” n slang, fok, n slang”

Thank god not many people understand Afrikaans so the guests had no idea what was going on. Steeling myself for the manly task of eradicating the snake I took a steady look at my opponent. About 1 meter in length, basking in the afternoon sun,  facing away from me so I couldn’t see it’s eyes.

Looking for an ideal weapon like a spade, nothing so I grabbed the next best thing. A hulahoop. Feeling like a complete fool trying to sort out this snake with my make shift weapon I inched closer, slow and steady. I thought to myself. My plan was working, so far the demon snake had not hissed or make any aggressive signs. Nearly there, ok time to see whats going to happen. I prodded it feebly to get it’s attention and possibly to show it who’s the boss. No reaction. What?

I prodded it a good couple of times and still no reaction, strange I thought to myself. Still fearful for my life, I touched it’s tail with my strong masculine hands (yeah right), it was warm to the touch but still not moving.

Then it dawned on me, this was a toy/ fake snake but some devil person had really taking a liking to making this toy so life like and real that I really thought I was holding a live snake. 

Feeling like a  fool and rightly so, I proceeded to chase that colleague of mine with the snake for the inconvenience that she caused. Bet she won’t be calling me again anytime soon when she has a situation. Problem solved!